Driving Drunk

When I first woke up I was confused. I had no idea where I was or how I'd gotten there. I felt like I was waking from the dead... maybe I was. I didn't know why I couldn't open my eyes, then I realized that my eyes were open. I began to see shapes and patches of light. I blinked away the grit and heaviness as I rolled from my side and raised myself onto my elbows. I soon sensed that my hands were wet and that I could feel something dripping onto them. I was beginning to see more clearly by now, even through the crimson haze. I looked toward the ground and realized that I was covered in blood. It was flowing through my eyes, down my face and dripping onto my hands. Images began to flood my mind... bits and pieces of what had just happened. I could see the windshield instantly transforming from clear to opaque as the safety glass spiderwebbed and shattered. I remembered a thunderous impact and the sound of twisting metal. Things started coming into focus in my mind as I realized that I was lying in the gravel along the side of the road. My lower torso and legs were still in the car. It seemed odd that the bottom of the car was virtually resting on the ground. I could feel weight on my legs and felt pinned down. I started to whimper a bit and then I heard my mother's voice. She told me that everything would be ok. She said not to move and that help was on the way. I started to twist and turn to try to look over at her, but she became more insistent in telling me not to move. And then I realized that she was pinned down as well. My father's body was lying across her legs and with a severely injured arm she had not been able to move the way that I had. From the extent of my dad's massive head injuries it was obvious, even to a 10 year old, that he had died instantly. I later realized that the weight on my own legs was the body of my little brother, Michael.

Amazingly, my mother's most serious injury was a severely broken arm. I had a broken jaw, ribs, collar bone, hips, pelvis, a fractured skull and dozens of stitches. I spent nearly 4 months in a body cast and several more months in physical therapy. I still have glass fragments in the side of my face and experience pain related to my injuries.

The date was July 9th, 1984. We were moving to the country from our house in McBain, Michigan. It was my older brother's birthday and he'd stayed behind in town because he'd had a softball game that afternoon. We'd finished moving and were heading back to town to pick him up and go out to dinner for his birthday when we met a car driven by an 18 year old man from Cadillac who was in a big hurry to get to his girlfriend's house. A couple of ducks wandered into the road from a pond nearby and this young man swerved to avoid them. He went off onto the shoulder of the road and lost control of his car when he attempted to get back into his lane. His father was wealthy and his day in court was over before it was even scheduled to begin. When we walked into the courthouse months after the crash he was huddled at the bench with his attorney and the judge. They spoke in hushed tones and never acknowledged our presence. We soon learned that he'd received a $50 fine for killing my father and brother. The possibility of intoxication was never even brought up in court... even though I remember seeing the road littered with beer cans as they pulled me from the wreckage. This young man walked away from his car with minor injuries and some back pain. One of the first responders later mentioned that the intoxicated party tends to experience a lesser degree of injury in car accidents... I took this to mean that it was also his opinion that the young man was indeed drunk.

I had thought about waiting until early July and posting something here in memory of my father and brother, but over the last several days something made me decide to do this sooner. An acquaintance from work spent last week in jail for his 2nd drunk driving offense. He jokes about it a lot and seems to have no remorse or concern for the possible danger that he puts himself and others in each time he drives drunk. He doesn't seem to have any plans for changing his behavior... he got drunk the night he got out of jail (I'm not sure if he drove anywhere that night). As his supervisor, I feel like I should avoid this issue with him because it is a personal issue for me and this is not a story that I enjoy telling. What happened to my family is the reason I couldn't wait to get out of my hometown when I was younger. I didn't like knowing that whenever anyone looked at me they remembered what I'd been through and felt pity. I'm sharing this story with you here and now because I hope that there is a possibility that it will make people think about the consequences of their actions. If you have no concern for yourself that's sad, but it's even more sad if you are willing to put someone else through the things that my family has been through. There's a holiday coming up soon. If you drink then or any other time, I hope that you'll remember this story and decide not to drive.

I made the the video posted above about a year ago. Mostly, I was just playing because I had gotten a new computer and was finally able to work with video more than I'd been able to with my laptop. It was sort of a tribute to lost family members. The man in the military uniform is my father... there are several pictures of my brother, Michael as well.

There is nothing cool about drinking and driving.

-Rob